Pricey Amy: I’m a fortunate dad to have three nice youngsters: ages 26, 24 and 22. They’re coping with life’s curveballs like all of us do, and they’re all doing very effectively.
Our youngest daughter started aggressive dance at 4, began performing and singing at 14 and graduated from school with a level in musical theater.
Her objective is to be on Broadway. She is so alive on stage! Her vitality and enthusiasm is contagious.
As a result of this discipline is so aggressive, we try to maintain her centered and optimistic. She may be very proficient and outworks everybody. She can be very delicate. It’s laborious on her when she doesn’t get employed after an audition.
She has gotten some roles, and never gotten others.
My spouse and I completely help her resolution to work on this discipline, however how ought to we assist her take care of her success and failures all through her profession?
Do you have got any ideas for how one can assist her keep inspired in a wholesome method?
— Supportive Dad and mom
Pricey Dad and mom: My very own recommendation to you mother and father is that you just insist that your daughter ought to work. She ought to search for temp or restaurant jobs that may accommodate her performing courses and auditions. Working will hold her grounded and busy — and related to different younger actors and artists.
She might want to be taught to handle and modulate her reactions to rejection. Each artist faces rejection all through their profession. And you’ll have to do the powerful parenting job of letting go.
For additional knowledge, particularly to your daughter, I’ve shared your query with Quinn Cummings, former actress and present creator of the great memoir: “Notes from the Underwire: Adventures from My Awkward and Beautiful Life,” (2009, Hyperion).
She responds: “The lifetime of the artist is difficult. The lifetime of the actor is more durable nonetheless. You’re keen on to color, you’ll be able to at all times paint, whether or not anybody desires your work. Performing requires an viewers.
“The one approach to prevail over this sort of life — which may simply exhaust and destroy shining, delicate souls — is to seek out methods to create that type of pleasure by yourself.
“Create a personality, write minute-long scenes, and put them on Instagram. Get a gaggle of like-minded folks collectively, resolve to behave out previous episodes of your favourite sitcom within the again room of a bar.
“Suppose up one thing demented and joyful, and convey it to the world for no different cause than it makes you content. That method, if the casting director is hateful, or nobody even seems to be up throughout your audition, you’ll be able to stroll out pondering not in regards to the ache, however in regards to the hilarious character you’re going to create from this. Dangerous occasions could make for excellent comedy. And, for what it’s price, when you’re creating materials for your self, you usually tend to give your self nice materials and look actually interesting whereas creating it. It’s figuring out fairly effectively for Rachel Bloom and Lin-Manuel Miranda.”
Pricey Amy: Our son and his spouse are separating and shortly to divorce after 10 years of marriage.
Our daughter-in-law has a toddler by a earlier marriage, they usually had one other baby collectively. We now have relationship along with his spouse, however we’re solely pretty near our step-grandchild, as a result of we’ve lived far aside and infrequently noticed that baby.
Christmas is coming and my husband and I aren’t certain how one can deal with presents now and sooner or later concerning the mom and her baby.
What do you assume?
— Not sure Grandparents
Pricey Not sure: Future holidays won’t ever be more durable than this one.
This yr particularly, you need to deal with all of those members of the family as you at all times have — with heat and kindness. Sure, embody a present for her baby (ask your son for concepts about what his stepchild would possibly wish to obtain).
By subsequent yr, each home conditions may need modified dramatically, and also you would possibly wish to make a special selection.
Pricey Amy: “Not sure” complained that her boyfriend refused to let her drink alcohol.
In your reply, you centered on the chance that she had a ingesting downside, however you by no means talked about the issue along with her boyfriend making an attempt to manage her! That was clearly probably the most pressing challenge.
Pricey Upset: I agree that his try to manage her was unacceptable. However as a result of she didn’t word him making an attempt to manage her in different methods, I requested her to do a personal stock to see if maybe her ingesting actually was an issue.